This week’s twit has been the unwitting victim of a terrifyingly complex shell game:
Theodore Roe on January 20, 1969, minutes after President Nixon's inauguration.
Theodore Roe
Yes, dear readers – I am that twit. Since I am in the unique position to explain how exactly I came to deserve this dubious honor, this week’s piece will take on more of an apology than the usual borderline-obsessive ranting regular readers are forced to endure.
I would like to begin by thoroughly apologizing. I have conducted myself in a manner that I find horrific by any measure. Through my lack of attentiveness I have become involved in an enterprise that, by my own standards of moral decency and civil duty, constitutes an institution rife with sickening corruption and a flagrant disregard for the laws of this country.
I have been in the employ of Joe Fosco, the criminal mastermind behind and titular head of The Chicago Outfit.
By serving thus I have furthered the reign of terror that the Chicago Outfit has showered down on the citizenry of the United States for decades in ways I can hardly fathom. Thankfully a man I found on the Internet was able to set me straight.
He is a voice of inspiration for those looking for truth on the Internet. Hopefully, with the aid of his YouTube videos, I will be able to move on.
But first I need your absolution. I plead with you, dear readers, to forgive me for allying myself with Joe Fosco and his empire of terror.
There were certainly signs, but I ignored them. There were the editorial staff meetings interrupted by visits from state and federal authorities, vague threats of physical violence should I ‘beef’ on the boss and the ever present audio loop of The Goodfellas soundtrack on the ANP office intercom.
But tonight I cry “No More!” I have worked out the chart of Capo di tutti capi Fosco’s illict operation and am going to call the FBI right this moment. I will turn government’s evidence and hopefully help the authorities put “The Ghost Don” behind bars forever.
This will only take a second. Okay, I’m dialing now.
Hello? Yes, FBI? My name is Theodore Roe. I work for Joseph Fosco, head of the Chicago Outfit. I want to help you bring him down!
…. I see.
… yes, but I saw – WAIT A MINUTE!
AH! Don Corleone runs The Outfit! Yes, FBI, I now know who REALLY –
… a movie, you say…
… uh-huh… So John DiFronzo, then?
…well… sorry to have taken up your time.
*click*
21 Comments
Theo,
Aside from your great article, this link will take you to a
YouTube piece that puts Tosto’s entire persona in the correct perspective:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=gKNmUFZgkTc
To Joe, It’s a shame he has to read it. Do you remember when I told you my cousins owned Al’s Restaurant in Cicero, and also how the Sicilian mob kidnapped the owner? That was my first cousins husbands father. Now that’s is the Sicilian mob (directly from Sicily). Oh, and do you remember when you asked me that you would have an interest in the Sicilian mob? Well I never told you something Joe. Joe Fosco, I never told you that there are a good deal of Sicilian soldiers that are right here in Chicag! The one guy Savadore a soldier and a stalker lives right by Oriole and Addison. He owns a bar called Bar LaCapinina 3 blocks off of Harlem on Addison. This is not to be mixed up with the many year Bar La Capinina from Grand and Harlem 10 years back. This guy hung at Nick’s bar, a half a block down, that now is closed.This guy is exactly like Lucabroxi! He thinks like him and stalks like him. What do I mean by stalks, I mean a perve. I met him at twenty years old, and all my live I had nothing to do with him. He won’t get the message that I got maried, so I wrote my cousin from Al’s Restaurant. Suddenly, I get tones of FBI in Nick’s. This was the week before and prior they picked up Joey “The Clown” Lombardo. They had Feds there and also in a then popular bar called “City Lights,” See, my cousins have a lot of parties, in their hall with polititians from Cicero. Hey, what they heck, it was a lead for Interpool Organized Crime wasn’t it? I think a lot of telling you about the Sicilian mob still and ever present right here in the windy city Chicago. I seem to be the only one who is able to go off center of your articles from the Chicago mob to th first had Organized Crime from Sicily. This article seems to be the only appropriate one. I will now go back a read the rest, of this artcle, so I could join in on the fun, and not pull everyone astray from the wit and humor. TX SQE
LMFAO!
Joe,
I have an issue with this chart. Lady Gaga is street boss of Melrose Park and Bozo the Clown is acting boss, but you have it the other way around.
I will bring this information to Theo’s attention.
Capt’n Jack had a beef (on the down low, of course) with the Austrian Oak and the whole MP Crew, so – admittedly – my knowledge of their operation is a bit sparse. Sorry if there are some minor discrepancies.
Having read this article and watched the countless videos of Mr. TNT, I an left with two thoughts. 1. this guy tnt tosto is actually kind of funny in a tongue and cheek way although I’m left sometimes wondering what the hell he’s talking about. 2. I think you need to clear up some of the stuff he’s talking about in his latest videos. Much like Trump pushed and received an answer regarding Obama’s birth certificate, or what amounted to be a birth certificate of sorts, TNT’s inquiries need addressing. I read your articles and find them but if any of the alleged reports on TNT’s site are true then I think you or someone else has some explaining to do. While skeletons in the closet are hardly an issue for most peoples lives, I do think someone who reports in the manner that you do or someone running for office should be upfront about their past. Something about stones and glass houses come to mind.
Dear Mr. Gara,
Anyone who is familiar with my articles on American News Post, already knows the answers that Mr. Tosto is pretending to seek (I think Mr. Tosto knows the real answers too). Keep in mind; my articles often have hyperlink attachments to third party sources that support my claims.
I agree with you that Tosto (at times) is humorous, but for 5-minutes. How much of the same overbearing and outrageous comedy could any reasonable person appreciate? It becomes a cartoon after a while.
It is not fair that Tosto repeatedly posts questions on my comment threads that contain profanity, which violates our strict “no profanity” policy, causing his comments to be rejected, and then accuses me of not answering his questions. His questions are designed to harass me, especially because of the use of profanity directed at me in each of his previously submitted comments. It is unfair that I am negatively criticized for not answering his inappropriate comments. If Tosto submits a question that lacks vulgarity and/or other harassment, it will be posted and answered.
I am aware that Toto posted 5 questions on his site recently, which I have taken the liberty of pasting below. I will answer them here.
Questions:
1) Joe have you ever had a job?
2) Joe did you get raped at Biltmore CC?
3) Joe did you ask out a sixteen year old girl and her father kicked the shit out of you?
4) Joe are you an alcoholic?
5) Joe did you collect disability from the state?
Answers:
1) Yes.
2) No – I was not raped. In addition, I was not criminally charged or sued for fraud by the individual who was named in a lawsuit filed on my behalf by Dr. Joseph Giacchino’s lawyer Michael Cohen in relation to the Biltmore Country Club subject. A patient of Dr. Giacchino (not the co-plaintiff) and I were coerced into the now revoked doctor’s fraud to suck money out of his victim, a wealthy member of Biltmore Country Club (this occurred several years ago). The fact that I was as much a victim in this matter as the wealthy target would be the reason I was not criminally charged or sued. Thank God, Dr. Giacchino lost his medical license. I trust that prison is his next stop.
3) No. I am not that one who speaks inappropriately to children. Tosto is: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=gKNmUFZgkTc
4) No. I admit that in the past, I have enjoyed having some cocktails on a regular basis, but I dealt with those social instances responsibly, which is why I could say that I have never committed a crime because of overdrinking alcohol.
5) No. I did not collect anything from the state. However, going back several years, I had received benefits from a similar governmental organization. The details are no ones business. And, I wish to point out that I have never been charged with or sued for disability fraud. If it were not for Dr. Joseph Giacchino’s abuse of me, I would have probably not qualified for said benefit as recent as 1999.
Please remember that my answers stated above have been indicated more than once in a number of articles on American News Post over the years and are still available for the world to read, 24-hours a day, seven days a week. Thank yo
Joe, You forgot one other question Tosto has asked in his very wonderous educated videos. What gives Joe Fosco the qualifications to be a Mobologist? Answer: Hanging out with Willie Messino for several years who was a made Outfit man in the Elmwood Park Crew and was direct with two of the Top Bosses in the OUTFIT for several years, Jack Cerone & John DiFronzo. That doesn’t even include all the other sources that have been listed on Joe Fosco’s latest article entited ‘ Sam Dyno DeStefano ‘. However, since Tosto has trouble reading, maybe he hasn’t seen them yet. What are Tosto’s qualifications besides being a bald loud mouthed blundering fucking idiot?
LOL
Has there been any backlash from the opposition because of this post or the YouTube video?
I have no idea and do not care one bit. My lawyers will deal with it in addition to the previous issues.
Joe, I just arrived back in Chicago and was summoned to meet with some very important Greek Gangsters over in Greek Town. At the meeting I was told that Greg Tosto has an I.Q. of 30 and is related to Telly Savalas. Also, he is the head of the Greek Mafia in Chicago and has control of all the Gyros sandwiches on the West Side. I thought you and any of your readers might want to know this valuable piece of information!
LOL
Thank you The Don. I will forward this intelligence to Theo for a possible update.
When Theo published the article above, I could not understand why a photo of Boy George was placed at the bottom on the right side. Today I discovered what some of you might have already figured out, it is actually Tosto dressed in drag. I wonder if he was dressed in drag when he accosted the child (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=gKNmUFZgkTc).
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Theodore_Roe
???
I know – it is a bizarre coincidence.
Joe, Tosto is so stupid that the opposite effect is being caused by his ranting ridiculous videos about you. He is like a critic giving bad reviews to a new movie which causes everybody to talk about the movie and disagree with the stupid ass ctitic and entices more and more people to go see the movie for themselves. Tosto is like having a free publicist. Any extra publicity he’s bringing to himself only convinces everyone, in my opinion, that he truly is a phony macho man idiot with a 6th grade ability to read. I wonder if he made it through grade school? Would you agree with my assessment?
Dear The Don,
I appreciate your opinion, however, I am not going to comment on Tosto again. He could fall away forever as far as I am concerned.
What a cute novelty. My neighbor would like one made of him
for his grandchildren as a joke. How much do you charge? $10.00?
LOL